


Twosome + Twosome = ?

by myfineasymptote



Series: Mfa's Many Tumblr Misadventures [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Begging, Dirty Talk, Drunk Sex, Foursome - M/M/M/M, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Rimming, Smut, Swingers, but heavily implied sober consideration, it's a Tokyo Ghoul and Attack on Titan smutty crossover, oh god so many - Freeform, so sort of dub-con, sort of, what more do you want from me?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-18
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-03-31 01:52:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3959947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myfineasymptote/pseuds/myfineasymptote
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi likes Eren, and is in denial about his feelings being requited. Hide is in love with Kaneki, and is terrified of losing his friend because of a stupid crush. The solutions to these problems might surprise you!</p><p>Hint: It's <i>smex</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ahahaha I just noticed my word count is 42 42  
> Jesus this fucker is long
> 
> All credit for this idea goes to awesome commentor SupaKawaiiDesu.

"Happy New Year!" Hide screamed, violently uncorking a bottle of wine, and letting out a screech as it sprays out.

On the couch, Levi let out a put-upon sigh and grumbled, "It's not even ten yet. And you're cleaning that up in the morning."

"Aww, come on Levi," Eren coos, plopping down next to him and shoving an unidentifiable (but most assuredly alcoholic) drink at him. "Live a little. Get crunk. Let's do this."

"What the fuck is getting crunk?"

From the floor at Eren's feet, Kaneki pipes in, "It's a portmanteau of crazy drunk."

"Okay, how the fuck do you know that."

Eren let's out a chuckle that is in no way similar to a giggle, and gets up to grab another drink, almost tripping over Kaneki as he does. Levi can't help but notice his face is unusually flushed, and resigns himself to another night babysitting the drunkards and sets aside the mixed drink Eren had apparently made for him.

Suddenly, Hide is in his face. "Levi!" 

Wrinkling his nose at the alcohol on the blond's breath, Levi responds with a deadpan, "What."

"We're doing this man. We're making it happen."

"Did you just quote that shitty Housetrapped webcomic at me?"

Kaneki lets out an ungainly snort, and throws his head back against the couch in laughter. Great, he must be shitfaced too. What the fuck is everyone drinking to get this bad? It's only ten-fucking-o-clock!

"Levi, Levi, Levi,  _listen_ -"

"I am listening, you just aren't saying anything-"

"We're gonna play a  _game_."

A cold twinge of unease makes its way down Levi's back.

"... What game?"

" _Never have I ever!_ " Eren says dramatically, as always as theatrical as his major implies.

There is a beat of silence as three pairs of eyes lock on Levi, and he suddenly realizes what the purpose of this game is. "No- I am not getting shitfaced. What would happen if one of you throws up in your sleep? I'm not gonna let you choke on your own vomit and die."

Eren wrinkles his nose at him. "Levi, that's fucking disgusting. Also you don't have a choice."

Levi is about to hotly protest that  _yes he does, and he has made it_ , when he notices the gleam in Kaneki's eye.

"Let's just say that I may be party to a certain specified item of information-"

"No-"

"And let's just imagine, if you will, what would happen if this information were released to a certain bespectacled friend of ours-"

"You little shit that was  _private_ -"

Eren clasps his hands and beams, interrupting Levi's attempt to get up and throttle a serenely drunk Kaneki.

"Soooooo, this means you'll play with us, right?"

Levi growls under his breath. "One round. That's all."

"Oh, and you have to play with that." Kaneki points at the drink Eren had mixed for him earlier. Levi can practically smell the stench of alcohol wafting from it. Glaring at each one of them in turn, he snaps, "I hate all of you."

* * *

Hide tries hard not to let a very evil grin show on his face. Ever since their last dorm Halloween party, which Levi had spent drunkenly sobbing on (an equally drunk) Kaneki's shoulder about how attractive he found Eren, and the pain he felt thinking his feelings were unrequited, the three of them had begun plotting Operation: Ereri ("Hide, is that really the best name-" "SHHH, it is perfection. Ereri is perfection").

After a few false starts at the "Winter Holiday" party and on Christmas, tonight is the night. The H.M.S. Ereri will launch tonight, or may God strike Hide down where he stands.

...

All clear? Phew! And of course, there is the  _other_  ship Hide was hoping to see launch. This was a bit more of a personal goal, but as the days of watching Kaneki adorably plan out all these cutesy rom-com escapades for Eren and Levi, Hide couldn't help but grow even more invested in seeing the U.S.S. HideKane sail to victory.

Which is why Hide had all too readily agreed to Eren's plan of "Fuck it! Let's all get wasted and then I'll kiss him at midnight on New Year's. If he's drunk off his ass maybe it will finally get through his thick skull!". After all, if Kaneki did end up rejecting him, then he would have plenty of booze to drown himself in.

Hide tries not to let himself think about the possibility the "just friends" is all they will probably ever be. Instead, he tries to think of answers for the never have I ever game that will force Levi to take a drink, but no one else. On round three it is actually starting to get a little difficult. 

"Never have I ever... hit a mailbox while taking the Driving test."

"Ok, one, fuck you, and two, I did not  _hit_  the mailbox, I _dinged_ _it_." Levi's glare and accusatory finger point is a lot less intimidating when moving his arm that quickly almost makes him topple over.

Hide grins. "Still failed."

" _Fuck you, fuck you, fuck all of you..._ " Levi looks down at his drink and grimaces. Hide feels for him. He'd watched Eren tip 12 oz. of tequila and 8 oz. of vodka into a few teaspoon's worth of orange juice to make that cocktail. Those first few shots look like they  _burned_.

"God it tastes like Satan's taint mixed with a dog's asshole," He complains, wiping his mouth. "OK, it's my turn."

Kaneki pouts (so adorably), and whines, "Actually, it is my-"

"-Bitch, shut up. You all're making me drunk, so I can... can... make you drunk too." Levi sways, and, okay, Hide can totally see where Eren is coming from now. That short stature, combined with his bangs in his eyes, and his eyebrows drawn in a drunkenly angry expression? Very cute. He's like a little angry kitten that curses like a sailor.

Kaneki giggles. "Did you just slur?"

"No!"

Eren takes the opportunity to lean next to Levi to whisper in his ear, or rather, loudly say to his nose, "You totally did, babe. We all heard you."

"Fuck you guys. Never have I ever ganged up on someone to get them drunk playing never have I ever! Now you have to drink! All yous!"

"You can't do that one," Hide hears himself pipe in, "you did that one last time! You have to pick a different one each time!"

Levi gives him another cute kitten glare. "You are all such rude.... jerkheads."

Kaneki lets out a hyena-esque laugh and falls over, luckily while not holding or accidentally knocking over his drink.

Hide is too distracted by his goofball crush to notice Eren nuzzling Levi like an over-affectionate cat, but he definitely hears him say, "You're the best, Levi, seriously. I love you."

Oh. Oh, shit. Hide jerks his head up to see the reaction and Levi- Levi is just staring at him, the drunken flush still heavy on his face, but otherwise utterly blank. Eren is still nuzzling him, apparently unaware he had spoken aloud.

 For a second, Hide is hopeful, but it is soon squashed as Levi's expression morphs into a pained one and he whispers back, "Thanks Eren, you're the best too."

Shit shit shit shit shit damage control damage control "Hey Eren?" Hide forces his voice up to be light and playful, and repeats the question until Eren has opened his eyes and turned to face him. "Maybe you should  _show_  Levi how you love him?"

At that, Levi starts, and Eren grins devilishly. Agonizingly slowly, Eren sits up, faces Levi, and leans closer, tipping Levi's head up with one hand while guiding him closer with the other...

Feeling almost a bit embarrassed for his part in this, Hide looks away to give them privacy as they kiss. Coincidentally, the place he chooses to look is at Kaneki, and he can't help but think of his second goal for the night. And it might just be the tequila talking, but Kaneki seems to be watching the other two with a look that could only be described as  _hungry_.

Hide can feel the blood rushing to his cheeks at that thought (and thankfully not another place) and shifts to a cross-legged position.

At his movement, Kaneki turns to look at him and- oh wow, his eyes are really dilated. Hide tries very hard not to think about the current implications of cutesy health fact that your eyes dilate when you see something you like, and instead softly calls Kaneki's name.

As he'd hoped, Kaneki scoots closer to hear him better. "Yeah?"

Hide swallows nervously. "Maybe we should give them a little privacy?" And maybe head to my room please?

Kaneki flushes and gives him the shyest, cutest little smile. "I like the view out here, though."

And that. That definitely made the basement perk up a bit. "Well, I don't think they want us watching-"

"They do, though. Eren's such an exhibitionist. Look!" With that, Kaneki half crawls into Hide's lap, brings his hands up to the sides of Hide's head, and turns him to look at the couple on the couch.

The couple has taken advantage of having the couch to themselves, and Eren has Levi's back pressed against the armrest as Eren lovingly kisses and nibbles at Levi's neck. Levi, for his part, has his legs wrapped around Eren's lower back, and his hands nestled in Eren's thick hair. After a few moments, Levi glances back to look at them and lets out a sexy groan, giving just the barest cant upwards of his hips.

And if that isn’t the sexiest thing Hide had ever seen....

Scratch that, Kaneki licking his lips, staring at them with half-lidded eyes, while half sitting in Hide’s lap is  _definitely_  the sexiest thing he has ever seen.

... Well, it's now or never, and Hide would really rather tell Kaneki his feelings than see the disgust when he feels them through his jeans. "Kaneki?" The brunette turns to look at him, still holding his hands to Hide's face. "I love you. I have for a while now. And I just, I had to tell... What's wrong?"

Eyes wide, Kaneki lowers his hands, and slaps one of them over his mouth. "What? No... Oh, noo..."

Oh god this is really happening. Be strong, Hide. Fight the tears, don't let him see you cry-

"Oh noooo, I was going to confess to you! You totally ruined the surprise, Hide!"

It's alright, knowing Kaneki he'll let you down gently, and won't hold your feelings against you-

"Hide?"

Hopefully it won't be too awkward. Hide will definitely have to avoid him for a while-

Kaneki tilts Hide's head up, breaking his train of thought. "I love you, too," he whispers, and presses his lips to Hide's and-

 _Fireworks_. Hide isn't sure if it's his eyes or his heart but something is emitting fireworks and he can feel the warmth of the flush in Kaneki's face and the softness of his lips, and just as he's getting into his rhythm, urging Kaneki's lips faster, he hears Eren catcall in the distance. Pulling back, he sees that the two of them have twisted to watch them. Eren is waggling his eyebrows at them suggestively, while Levi is staring quietly with an unreadable expression. Hide is not sure which he is more nervous about. So instead he just makes a face at them.

Eren mock-yells, "Show us yer tits!" and Kaneki drops his face into his hands. From what Hide can see, he's blushing all the way down his neck. Full-body blusher. Score. Hide becomes so absorbed in trying to get Kaneki to let him see his adorable little blushing face that Hide doesn't notice Levi's approach until he's right next to him. _  
_

"Hey," Levi shifts- or rather, sways- to a crouch next to them. "Are we still playin'? Never have I ever?"

Hide's mind goes blank. "Uh..."

"Never have I ever," Levi announces loudly, "ever ever ever kissed Hide." And with that, Levi grabs Hide's shirt and pulls him forward into a deep, open-mouthed kiss.

* * *

 If Kaneki had ever stopped to think about his fantasies of seeing Hide make out and get fucked by someone else- be it Eren, Levi, or a particularly attractive stranger- he might have worried that those thoughts were "abnormal" and become extremely self-conscious of them. Instead, he saw it as the natural extension of the "guys love watching two women makeout" trope.

So when Levi kissed Hide, Kaneki had to pinch himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Aw man, if it wasn't hot enough watching Eren and Levi kiss, now his own fantasies are coming to life. Distantly, he notes that it's a lot different from how he'd imagined. He'd pictured Hide assuming control of the kiss, bringing his natural bubbly confidence into the bedroom, but if anything Hide was very content to allow Levi to have his way with him. After a few moments of lips moving and tongues brushing, Hide cracked an eye open as if to check Kaneki's reaction.

Something in his expression must have been good, because Hide let out a shudder and moan of delight, causing the seat of Kaneki's pants to suddenly feel too tight. The blonde slowly disentangled himself from Kaneki, before pressing forward into Levi's lap, deepening the kiss and nipping at Levi's lips and tongue, making him let out short gasps of delight-

God what Kaneki wouldn't give to be naked right now, to free his straining erection. He could probably come just from a few quick scraps over his junk, so arousing does he find the scene in front of him.

Kaneki is pondering how best do deal with his "little problem", when he feels Eren slide down the space next to him. Eren grins at him, leans forward, and whispers, "Never have I ever kissed Kaneki," and then- hmm!

This is... really nice. Eren is a very gentle kisser, unlike Hide who needs to go fast and  _go now_ , Eren is content to let the kiss build slowly, calmly following Kaneki's lead, giving an occasional nip and lick of the tongue. The rhythm is slow and good, and Kaneki is beginning to feel himself calm down when Eren suddenly sucks on Kaneki's bottom lip, softly dragging his teeth over it and Kaneki hears himself let out a low sound. When all movement stills in the room, Kaneki can feel himself flush. What an embarrassing thing to do, here everyone else is being incredibly sexy and smooth, Kaneki is just sitting around making weird noises-

Eren suddenly pulls back, and stares at Kaneki with a fierce-looking expression. "God, you are just so-"

Unable to finish his own sentence, Eren pushes Kaneki flat on the ground, and swings a leg over to straddle him. Carefully lowering and raising himself to grind their crotches together, Eren lets out a positively  _pornagraphic_  groan and shuts his eyes, the very image of sexy.  God, Kaneki's dick is making a very noticeable lump in his jeans, and it's so hard it hurts to be this trapped. Hoping for a bit of relief, the next time Eren lowers himself again Kaneki rises up to meet him. Eren lets out a noise that has Kaneki's dick thrumming, and he thinks he makes another weird sound again but  _really can't be assed to care right now this is the best thing ever_. 

Abruptly, Kaneki feels himself being pulled up and out from under Eren and he can't stop a whimper, which quickly becomes a moan as whoever grabbed him reaches down to palm at his dick. Looking up, Kaneki is surprised to realize that it's Levi. 

Well, what goes around comes around. Kaneki twists up to tug an arm around Levi's neck, pulling him down for a kiss while- quite smoothly in Kaneki's opinion- simultaneously bringing his other hand down to palm at Levi's crotch. Oh. Oh, wow. Levi is... packing, to say the least. Kaneki wonders what it would taste like. Oh, but, if he's dating Hide now, it might be inappropriate to do so without at least talking to him about it first.

As if he could hear Kaneki's internal debate, someone wraps their arms around Kaneki's shoulders and identifies himself as Hide through a whisper in his ear, "You know what you should do? You should suck him off while I fuck you." Oh god. If thinking of Hide making out with someone else was hot, then the thought of  _sucking someone else off as Hide fucks him_  is the temperature of fucking  _molten lava_. And- out of the corner of his eye, he notices Eren coming towards them carrying lube, condoms, and a devilish smile- the thought of  _Eren_  in the room doing god knows what??? It's the sun. Kaneki's brain melts and all he can do is let out a high pitched whimper from sexy overload. _  
_

Kaneki is quickly stripped of his pants and shirt, and Levi and Hide began worshipping his body from the front and side, caressing, kneading, licking and nipping their way around, occasionally stopping to pull the other into a heated kiss. Meanwhile, Eren took over his back, kneading his ass and licking at the small of his back in a way that just made Kaneki  _shudder_. He can't hold in a gasp as Eren finally spreads his cheeks apart and licks at the sensitive rim of his asshole. 

"N- Not there! It's dirty," Kaneki gasps, letting out another shudder. God, when he'd imagined the pleasure of sex, he'd always focused on the pleasure of doing the fucking, not the one being fucked. Eren smiles and chuckles into his ass, murmuring something Kaneki can't quite catch. Eren spreads his cheeks wider, tonguing the tight rim. Kaneki hears himself let out a high pitched squeak he hadn't known he was capable of making as Eren's tongue presses inside. After rubbing a few tight circles around the rim of his hole, Eren suddenly pulls back, and returns holding the lube. Squeezing a bit of it into his palm, Eren rubs it into his palm to help warm it up. Looking up, he notices that Kaneki has twisted his head back to watch him. Eren gives him small, loving smile and gives him an eskimo kiss. Which is interrupted by Kaneki's gasp as Hide grazes one of his rock hard nipples with his teeth.

Without another word, Eren begins generously rubbing the warmed lube into and around Kaneki's ass, and it isn't long before he feels a long slender finger enter him. Kaneki lets out a quiet hum at the feeling, but is currently much more focused on Levi, who has pulled away from him and begun unbuttoning his pants just enough to let his gorgeous cock peak out. Kaneki can feel his mouth watering at the sight, even before Hide's whispered, "God, you are really are a cockslut, aren't you, Kaneki? Is your other hole just as greedy as your mouth is?" 

Hide brings his hand up to caress Kaneki's face- which he appreciates, but kinda busy here, Hide- and then shoves three fingers roughly into his mouth. Oh, fuck. Hide slowly fucks Kaneki's mouth with his fingers, telling him what a good little whore he's being, and Kaneki is  _really thinking he can get off to this_ , when Eren hits this one spot deep inside him-

With a muffled, "OH, FUCK" Kaneki comes, panting through Hide's fingers. "Enjoy that?" Hide whispers with a smile as Kaneki begins to catch his breath. Kaneki hums quietly, looking up at Hide through half-lidded, well-fucked eyes- "I think your cock will feel better, Hide." Hide's face twists at that, torn between delight and surprise, before finally settling on a 700 megawatt grin. "Oh Ken, we are gonna fuck you  _good_."

With that, he slides back and joins Eren in warming up some more lube, before sliding in his finger- and then Eren slides in another finger- Kaneki's cock is already weakly twitching back to life, when Levi grabs his shoulders and gently re-positions him so that his ass is in the air- all the easier for Hide and Eren to fuck and oh god is that the sound of them making out back there? Heaven, Kaneki is in  _Heaven-_ and Kaneki's mouth is near the ground next to Levi's enormous cock, and Kaneki is just aching for it, he just wants to choke on that dick. "Ah, ah," Levi reprimands when he reaches for it, "Say please," 

"Please, Levi, I need- I wanna, ah!" Ohgodyes both fingers brushing that spot  _yes_. "You want to what, Kaneki?"

"I want-" Kaneki takes a deep breath, "IwanttosuckyourcockLevi,please"

Levi laughs, gives himself a few slow pumps, and  _finally_ , allows Kaneki to wrap his lips around the leaking tip. The pre-cum tastes like Kaneki's own, salty and bitter- what? like you've never got drunk and horny and curious about what you taste like before- but  _jesus_ , his dick is so huge, Kaneki can only fit a few inches into his mouth before his gag reflex kicks in. Wrapping his hands around the rest of it, Kaneki begins slowly jerking Levi off, feeling the loose, soft skin slowly get warmer and tighter as Levi hardens. When Hide, or possibly Eren- Kaneki has no way of knowing anymore- withdraws their finger in order to insert two, Kaneki has to pop off Levi's cock to give a loud groan. "There you go, you horny little bitch, fuck yourself on my fingers-" Kaneki hadn't even noticed that he'd been pressing back on Hide's fingers. " _God_ , such a good cockslut. I'm gonna have you ride my dick and play with your perky little nips until you come without even being- mmph!" At that noise, Kaneki looks back to see- Eren is standing, and Hide is- Hide  _is sucking him off, and fucking Kaneki with his fingers at the same time_.

Levi cuts off Kaneki's low groan by pulling his head back and gently nudging his cock against his cheek. Kaneki obeys the unspoken command and goes back to blowing him, licking long strokes up Levi's cock like it was a Popsicle. He mouths at it with his lips, pressing soft kisses as he begins moving his hands again, alternating between tight squeezes, and light pumps. Levi makes a delicious low humming noise, and runs his hands through Kaneki's hair. 

Kaneki's concentration is broken by loud, "Yes, that's it, suck me, suck me, suckme!" and he turns, this time making sure to keep his hands moving, and sees Hide, Hide sucking Eren's ball sack and groaning, probably giving it the most fantastic vibrations- and Eren comes all over Hide's hair. "Fuck," Eren whispers, collapsing on the ground with a sigh.

Hide grins at Kaneki wickedly, before withdrawing his fingers and snapping a condom on. He pumps himself agonizingly slowly, obviously putting on a show for Kaneki and Levi's benefit.

When he reaches to grab more lube, Kaneki turns back to Levi's dick, quivering in anticipation of getting thoroughly fucked. Lapping the pre-cum once again beading at the tip, Kaneki cleans off the head of Levi's dick, wraps his lips around it, and sucks. Finally, he manages to make Levi mutter a quiet curse, but he's not sure if it's from his oral skills or the tip of Hide's cock he can feel just about to penetrate him. Slowly, Hide makes his way forward, pausing when Kaneki bring his head up to pant and moan. Before long, Kaneki can feel a softness around his ass and realizes that, holy shit, Hide is  _inside him_. Hide seems to experience a similar revelation. "God, yes, take my fat cock. Take it all the way,  _yes_ ," and all this dirty talk is  _really_  working for Kaneki,  _holy shit-_

And at that moment, Kaneki wraps his lips around Levi's cockhead, sucks in, then takes Levi's hand, brings it to the back of his own head, and begins using it to push himself down. Before long, Levi gets the idea- and is very careful not to push him far enough to activate his gag reflex- and just fucks Kaneki's mouth with the tip of his dick. And then Kaneki lets out a low groan as Hide starts truly fucking him, hard and fast and rough, hitting that spot again and again- when a hand lightly scratches the small of his back, making Kaneki shudder and tighten his ass around Hide's thick cock- and Hide orgasms with a gasp and a low moan. He stays there, buried deep inside Kaneki for a few moments before pulling out and sitting down, as the hand moves forward to reveal itself to be Eren. 

Kaneki pops off the head of Levi's dick, so fucked that he almost can't comprehend Eren when he suggests they "Share?"

After a few moments, however, Kaneki's eyes light up and he scoots over to allow Eren to join in. They both lick long stripes up Levi's cock, listening to his breath start to quicken as the take turns sucking at the head of his cock, making out around it- it's not too long before Levi comes over their faces, leaving Eren and Kaneki to lick his spunk off of them and jerk each other off.

* * *

 Lying with his arms around his fucked out flat mates, Eren smiles to himself. All according to keikaku*.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *keikaku means plan


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey remember how this was going to be a hideously kinky one-shot?? Well... Now it's a hideously kinky two-shot. For now. Will continue if given suggestions! :)  
> [Tumblr](www.myfineasymptote.tumblr.com).  
> Thanks/Blame goes to the awesome SupaKawaiiDesu  
>  ~~I'm sinnin' tonight!~~

Hide hovers the mouse button button over the "Call" button. "Are you sure you're ready? We could always call and tell 'em to wait a bit..."

Kaneki continues fidgeting in his seat, and glares. "Just do it, already! It's not like we haven't done this a thousand times in person! Jesus."

Hide shakes his head. "You're so cute when you're embarrassed." He clicks the blue button, and they both watch eagerly as three grey dots appear on the laptop screen.

In just a few seconds, the connection is made.

"Hello Tokyo! Season's greetings from Berlin!" Erin's face takes up almost the entire screen, but Hide and Kaneki are too happy to see him to make fun. 

"Season's greetings." "Seasonal whatever! Is Levi there with you, or did he go back home already?"

"Gee, really happy to see you to, Hide," Erin deadpans, as a laugh echoes tinnily in the background.

Hide gives the screen his characteristic sunny smile. "Just making sure that we're actually doing this thing! You would feel so awful about not getting to see this, you don't even know."

The screen tilts slightly and Erin makes a goofy face at something off camera, before it turns slightly and the frenchman is in view. "So, are going to just sit around talking about this, or...?"

Hide laughs breathily. "Oh, well we- we actually already started." The blond tilts the camera so that all of Kaneki's body is visible, revealing the latter to be completely naked, handcuffed to his chair, painfully hard, and for some reason making tiny thrusting motions with his hips. Suddenly noticing that he's on camera, Kaneki turns a bright cherry red.

" _God, that is sexy,_ " Levi groans, as Erin mutters a soft, " _Yes_...."

Hide turns the laptop to face him again. "Oh, that's not the best part," He says knowingly, picking the laptop up and carrying it around behind Kaneki.

He brings it closer so they can hear the soft buzzing noise. 

"A vibrator?!" Erin shouts, joining Levi on screen. His eyes glint in delight. "You actually got one?! Oh this is so great- which one did you guys get?! I know I recommended getting a ribbed vibrating one-"

"Maybe," Kaneki interrupts breathily, "this isn't the best time for that-  _ahh_ ," He moans, as grinning Hide shows them the dial he had just turned up. "Cordless. It gets turned up every time he's been bad. What about you guys?"

"Oh yeah!" Erin tumbles offscreen somewhere, and can be heard rummaging around. Levi rolls his eyes, and Hide takes the opportunity to walk back around to the front of Kaneki. He sets the laptop on the bed, being sure to re-tilt it again so that Ken is clearly visible, before settling down at the brunette's feet and slowly stroking his hard cock.

After a few more moments, Erin calls off-screen, "Found it!" (and Levi mutters "Why didn't you have it out in the first place?"). Erin comes back on-screen, brandishing a mess of belts. "So my friend Armin is like a super genius, and he came up with this idea of using a steam-powered device to go all parkour on stuff and- anyway! Belts! Look at all these belts!" Erin grins and waggles his eyebrows. "Is anyone else thinking of bondage...?"

Ignoring Hide's "YES!", and Kaneki's moan, Levi cuts in with a protest, "Won't Armin mind? I don't think he'd be okay with us returning his project smelling like sex and lube."

Grinning, Erin nuzzles at Levi's neck. "Oh bae, you are so cute. This is just a prototype. It doesn't work at all. And you can just detach them, see?" Two soft clicks and thunks are heard as Erin apparently releases the two metal boxes attached to the belts. "See? Now they're just belts."

"Get it Levi," Kaneki whispers, staring intently at the camera. " _Get some_."

Hide laughs. "I can't decide if that was bad or not! I-" He pauses to lick a stripe up Kaneki's dick, "-wholeheartedly agree though."

Erin grins mischievously as he begins sorting through the belts. "Oh, it was very bad. I want to see you cry, Kaneki."

Levi grunts, "More like cry from wanting my dick in his mouth."

Hide smiles. "Aw, play nice. I like it when my little whore gets mouthy." Hide begins rubbing the precum beading at Kaneki's dick around, inciting several soft, sinful gasps from the latter. "Besides, we want my slut to talk, right? To beg for my dick to fuck his tight ass-"

"Yes!" Gasps a well-trained Kaneki, "Want you- want to fuck me-"

" _Jesus_ you two, stop, we haven't even started yet!" Erin teases playfully, beginning to belt Levi into the straps.

"I can't help it!" Hide says, raising his hands- and leaving Kaneki to whimper from the loss-,"The cockslut begs, and I must oblige."

With that, Hide stands and begins unbuckling his pants, and Levi groans. "Yeah, fuck that mouth, make him work for it-"

Hide grabs Kaneki's head, and presses it against the tent in his underwear. " _Fuck,_ " he whispers, and Kaneki begins dutifully mouthing and licking at the head of his dick, the wet patch in his underwear...

"Better hurry up, Erin, they're beating us," Levi deadpans.

"Shut the fuck up! Why are there so many belts, oh my god. Where the fuck does this even go."

"Not to mention it's not a competition," Hide quipped, grinning lazily as he pulled down his underwear and let his boner spring free. "And even if it were, there is literally no way I can lose. I am about to shove my huge cock-" he grabs said organ, and drags it across Kaneki's face, elicting a soft whine, "-down the throat of my filthy little cumslut-" gripping Kaneki's head again, Hide pulls him forward to meet his leaking penis, giving it a few shallow thrusts, " - and,  _ahh_ , you're gonna swallow it all, suck down my cum you bad little bitch you-" Hide had just barely edged his tip past Ken's puffy red lips when he was distracted by a slight noise.

Peering back at the screen, he didn't bother to stifle a low groan at the sight of Levi, his chest, legs, and hips bound in tight leather straps. He watched as Eren shuffled behind Levi to tie some straps in the back, frowned, apparently deciding fuck it, and used them to tie Levi's hands behind his back. His task done, Eren looks up at the camera and grins. "Well? Wanna compete to see who can put on the best show? It's not like we've got anything to lose."

Snapping out of his reverie, Hide pulls himself from Kaneki's mouth and pets his soft black hair. "Hear that, whore? They wanna see you beg, wanna see how I fuck your tight little mouth. Do you wanna show them?"

Kaneki stares at him uncomprehendingly through half-lidded eyes, gaze drifting from Hide's face, and back down to his hard cock.

"Yeah," he whispers, shutting his eyes and smiling blissfully. "Fuck me, take me, make me yours."

 Without warning, Hide grabbed the edges of Kaneki's chair and turned it 90 degrees to give the laptop a good view of the action. 

Ignoring Kaneki's adorable little squeak, Hide pulled his pants fully down, and knelt to fumble in his jean pocket. Finding what he was looking for, Hide looks up, grins wickedly and brandishes the controller to Kaneki's vibe. 

"Let's see what pretty noises you make around my cock stuffed in your mouth, Ken." With that, he turned the controller fully up, stood, brought his hands up to Kaneki's head once more, and began fucking his mouth at a rough pace.

Hearing the excited squeaks and moans (and feeling the vibrations of them on his arousal), Hide let out a pleasured sigh. _Beat that, team ereri._

On the laptop screen, Eren and Levi had also moved. Levi was pressed face down into the mattress, face turned slightly to stare into the camera (or rather, stare at him and Kaneki, Hide thought triumphantly) and groaning softly from-

 _Jesus,_ Eren pulling the last of a string of thick white beads from his ass. And then he raised one hand back to circle around the tight rim and-

Hide let out a long low groan, and he wasn't sure if it was the sight of Eren finger-fucking Levi or the swipe of Kaneki's tongue swiped across his slit. Hide looked down at him to see Kaneki's eyebrows raised in a silent,  _Pay attention to me!_.

Satisfied at having Hide's attention, Kaneki edged forward as far as he could with his hands handcuffed to the chair, and thrust his face forward until he was swallowing around Hide's cock, chin rested against Hide's sack and breath warm against Hide's stomach.  After a few moments of delicious torture as Kaneki's throat milked the cock for its cum, Hide felt a tightening sensation down below. "Such a good cockslut," he gasped, "You been practicing with Levi? Did you choke on him until he could throatfuck you like this?"

Hide pulled out to catch his breath, not wanting to end it too soon. "Or did you get Eren to help you?" Kaneki whimpered needily, opening his mouth and sticking out his tongue.

Pressing back inside, feeling that glorious wet heat around him, Hide lost his train of thought as he quickly felt his orgasm rebuilding. A sharp gasp brought his attention back to the laptop, where Eren was roughly fucking Levi into the mattress.

"I- I want to see you," Hide gasped, "want to see them fuck you you. Suck both of them at once. Wanna see you choke on their dicks-" With that fantasy in his mind's eye, and one last swallow, Hide came down Kaneki's throat with a high pitched grunt that he would have sworn came from Ken.

Feeling weak in the knees, Hide dropped back down to the floor, reveling in the high of his orgasm for a few too short moments.

As he winds down, he hears Kaneki's soft whimpers and sees him grinding back into the chair- probably onto the vibe, he notes distantly- his painfully hard cock twitching. Tiredly, Hide wraps a hand around it, brings himself forward to wrap his lips around it- and feels his mouth filly with salty cum almost instantly.

Hide pulls the vibe from Kaneki's ass and shuts it off as the latter gasps, trying to catch his breath. Patiently, Hide waits for Ken's cock to stop twitching, and his eyes to reopen, before slipping up into his lap and drawing him into a soft kiss. Deepening the kiss, Hide tongues Kaneki's own cum into his mouth and can't stop himself from breaking the kiss and laughing when he feels Kaneki's face twist at the taste. Nevertheless, he dutifully swallows, and they both sit back to watch the other couple on the screen. 

Before too long, Levi comes with a low groan, sagging limply forward into the bed, and Eren's face twists amusingly at the feeling of the tightening against his dick. After a few more deep thrusts, Eren gasps sharply and stops, buried deeply within Levi.

Hide watches Eren's face smooth in pleasure and grins at Levi's mumbled complaining about "fucking cream pie me, man. I'm gonna be shitting white all week why the fuck didn't you put on a condom"

In the momentary silence as everyone finishes recovering, Hide pipes up, "So, what're we doing for round two?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this was so late! I was busy doing a thing. And then I procrastinated the thing by finishing this. My life is just one long cycle of procrastination, basically.
> 
> All 3DM/ODM Gear shenanigans based on my personal experience with those motherducking straps... heehee, ducking.


End file.
